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  • Haley Shane

Where Have All the Tomboys Gone?

Written by Gays Against Groomers member Haley Shane

Remember seeing tomboys? Girls that played in the mud, played sports with the boys teams, and would rather wear cleats than be caught in heels?

I remember. I was one.

My mom and dad tell a very colorful story of me throwing a dress on the floor after my grandmother practically forced it on me. I was 4. I had no idea what a gender was. Or sex. Or a sexual orientation. I just knew I didn't like dresses. I liked football. And playing in the mud. And working on cars with my dad. (I use the term "working" loosely)

Now? I'd be labeled a boy trapped in a girl body. I'd be recommended puberty blockers, hormones (DRUGS — call them what they are), and maybe even Gender Reassignment Surgery. That's horrifying to think of as an adult.

What makes no sense to me on top of it, is the same crowd that would tell me to do all that, would also preach that gender is a social construct.

But it made me wonder, what would my life look like had I been "transed" (transed - verb - assuming someone who is attracted to the same sex, or has interests of the opposite gender, that they are trapped in the wrong body. Example: "Haley got transed into being a dude cause she likes football and vagina.")

Well, I know I wouldn't be as healthy as I am now. I wouldn't be as grounded, stable, secure. I wouldn't accept myself for who I am. I'd have LOADS of identity issues, and my dating pool would be cut to 0.

But, I grew up in a different time. (That sounds weird to say, I'm only 29.) I want to say, if you're a woman or a girl reading this and you like sports, and playing football, and shooting guns, and anything else considered "masculine" or "manly"... You might be a lesbian. But you're definitely a tomboy. And tomboys are fucking rad.

Own it. Embrace it. BE PROUD OF IT.

To answer the question in the beginning of this post; "Where did all the tomboys go?" They went to gender identity clinics cause someone told them they were probably a man. And they sadly, believed it.


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